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Archive for May, 2008

The Night Desk with LarryKingJolson

Published: May 31st, 2008

i’m not a fan of MMA or boxing…but i must say that the big MMA show on CBS is making MMA look a helluva lot like the WWF. it’s really gross.

if you’re like LKJ and you have no good prospects of sucking real nipples tonight…head over to the “GUESS THE BREAST” game at on205th. there’s lots more like us hanging out over there.

finally! an ugly teacher having sex with her students! we were beginning to think only the perfect 10’s were looney tunes enough to risk everything for some 15 year old snausage. {h8torade}

that’s sketchy. wtf that means. {shredordie}

now we know why dupes is into hockey. {fakebuzzbissinger}

the dude chick gina carano is fighting isn’t as attractive as this photo. i’m just saying. how do they protect their boobies???????

update: carano is bleeding from her nose. but kaitlin young appears to be in trouble.

update: carano wins. pretty bogus fight. gina’s still super cute.

the daily gizmodo: these geek gang signs will get you shot in compton.

dudes. is ozzy osbourne a lipsyncher?

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The LATEest Chris Cooley Wedding Pix

By: iAMgod
Published: May 31st, 2008

yeah…we know we’re super late. but we won’t be able to post the chris cooley cheating with two skank groupies pictures and the chris cooley divorce trial pictures if we don’t post these.

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Hardaway Seeks to be First Twink-Hating NBA Coach

By: iAMgod
Published: May 31st, 2008

You’ll remember that Tim Hardaway waxed homophobic a while back stating that “he hates gay people”, “i’m homophobic”, and “they (gays) shouldn’t be in the world, in the United States”.

(we thinks he doth protesth too much)

That was then. This is now. Hard-on-away is now turning his attentions to the presumed-heterosexual Pat Riley who apparently is not willing to offer Hardaway a coaching job with the Miami Heat.

“I’ve talked to Pat (Riley),” Hardaway said. “Had great conversations with him. Don’t know why I’m not there. I’ve been trying for three or four years now. Don’t know why I’m not there. It’s kind of frustrating to me because I know I can help them out with that type of stuff — scouting, helping out with the guys, making sure they understand what they need to do.

“It’s kind of frustrating to have my expertise around and willing to help and they’re not calling.”

They’re not calling, Tim, because you are a caveman. And we all know how that caveman show did on network TV.

Nuff said. Here’s the full article.

h/t sportsbybrooks and awfulannouncing

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NBA Plans Crackdown on Flappers

Published: May 31st, 2008

josh hamilton and joakim noah are smoking chronic. charles barkley owes half a mil. tim donaghey is naming names. joey crawford is a dingleberry.

and the nba is cracking down on floppers?

oy.

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Ravens, Harbaugh Surprised That University of Delaware QB Was in College

Published: May 31st, 2008

ravens head coach john harbaugh has deviated from the andy reid franchise-building playbook by becoming a whiner a full three months before the opening of his first season.

harbaugh is peeved that qb joe flacco can’t attend OTA’s due to an agreement between the NFL and NCAA aimed at keeping kids in college.

imagine that.

the rule prevents rookies from joining their teams until their college has ended the spring semester. presumably the ravens knew that flacco’s college, the prestigious university of delaware, didn’t end the spring session until the first week of june. (apparently blue hens need a month more of school each semester than kids at more….rigorous…..institutions)

but yet they whine about it. harbaugh, who has been a head coach for all of four months, is already frustrated by rules that other coaches have lived with for years.

“It’s an out-dated rule that we really need to evaluate,” Harbaugh said. “Look, I want every guy to get his college degree. But my father coached at the college level for a long time and he always said, ‘If a guy wants to get his degree, he’s going to do it.’”

buck up, little sparky…..you’re only going to be head coach for 36 or so months…..no sense ruining it by complaining about the little stuff. this, too, shall pass……just like your head coaching career.

read jason cole’s story about this subject on yahoo here.

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The Night Desk with LarryKingJolson

Published: May 28th, 2008

 

 
tiricosuave has the inside poop on carlos guillen’s ass issues. (sorry, we couldn’t resist)

speaking of ass….don’t h8 h8torade for using this picture to dramatize the shitter situation on the international space station.

if you’ve got a moment for actual sports coverage, fivetooltool will educate you on the instant replay in baseball issue

what if other rappers followed T.I. (who just named his son Major Harris) and named their sons after failed qb’s?

h/t to awfulannouncing for bringing this PREPOSTEROUS story of an unassisted triple player that didn’t touch a defender:

the daily gizmodo: you’ll have to read the story to see what this is all about.

willie randolph needs some modern love:

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The Night Desk with LarryKingJolson

Published: May 27th, 2008

tiricosuave films brings us a fun mashup involving one of our favorite movie scenes of all time:

go to on205th to pick out your favorite raiderette. go ahead, there’s dozens to choose from. some even have natural boozies. here’s the one i’m taking to bed tonight:

much love and a hardy welcome to the demon spawn of huggingharoldreynolds, thefightins.com, which, surprisingly, is not about the lohans but is about everyone’s favorite ball team:

one of our favorite sites, h8torade, brings the wood with one of our favorite videos from one of our favorite bands..weezer:

we think peter king is a pompous insider dick stroker. (buy us an old style and will tell you what we really think about him). kissingsuzykolber pokes some fun at his trip to iraq:

the daily gizmodo: olympic stadium by ikea?

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three fine young men from seattle:

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WRASCAR 101- The Education of A Gasman

Published: May 27th, 2008

Poor Gasman. Beautiful, brilliant Gasman. Wanting to swim in the big water with all the other Wrascar fans.

Our leader suggested that, after blowing a tire, the driver of Rocket 88 dipped into some nachos and downed an AMP energy drink before deciding to peel his car off the wall. His behaviour in this instance mirrors that of the driver of the 18 car earlier this year. Thats one thing about a blown tire…that hotrod will take you anywhere IT wants to go…

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The Night Desk with Larry King Jolson

Published: May 26th, 2008

CLICK HERE IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR CAROLA BOTT, THE ANNA KOURNAKOVA OF BADMINTON!!!

hey now!

i know i’m not the flatusyahu motorsports guy….but i have to use this clip to defend citizen busch, who took a lashing from conraddupes today over cb’s coca-cola600 coverage. as you will see from the clip….dale earnhardt jr. forgot how to make left hand turns:

the fox commentators originally speculated that JR had fender problems which may have prevented him from steering. i, larrykingjolson, nascar fan of over 60 years, suggest that this is total BULLSHEVITZ! i suggest that JR basically threw a traditional sit-down strike for 15 seconds or so after the tire blow-out…and that sit-down strike caused his car to incur a lot damage.

now onto some poontang via on205th. gemma atkinson nude in a pool. whip it, indeed.

only for loyal larrykingjolson readers…here’s your first look at tomorrow’s story on ashley hackleroad posing for playboy:

the daily gizmodo: why we miss having a roommate:

tell these people something they don’t know about me:

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The Night Desk with LarryKingJolson

Published: May 25th, 2008

we’re like on205th….we enjoyed all the indy500 commercials and look forward to seeing some racing next year.

you know how we know you’re gay? you’re a kasey kahne fan, that’s how.

you think i’m ugly….take a look at how ugly is america getting:

staying with the racing theme…..fanmanual has the scoop on how to hunt mullet at the local nascar race.

lifeinthefastlane offers up a photo essay on bodybuilding gone amuck

the daily gizmodo: tiny little robot feller scales grand canyon.

cab over pete with a reefer on? further proof that entertainment in the 70’s was the shit:

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