Najeh “The Mad Shitter” Davenport (aka “The Dump Truck”, aka “Dookie”) last night carried Pittsburgh to a huge victory over the Rams while at the same time taking a shit on the hopes of Willie Parker fantasy owners everywhere.

Davenport you will remember was accused of defacating (that means taking a shit for all you people in Arkansas) in a women’s dorm room.

As a Willie Parker owner, we ask you Mr. Davenport, to take your steamers elsewhere next year.

….You can GFY, Larry Nemmers. You tried to give the gave to them but the stinkin’ Dallas Clownboys™ didn’t want it (or couldn’t hold onto it with that ham-handed QB). By the way……

…nice mooseknuckle. How’d the beans get above the frank?

Mad props to the genius FantasyHumor.

With fantasy playoffs just around the corner….T.O. owners everywhere want to know….

….what do we do about the Patrick Crayton Situation?

What situation, you ask?

Although T.O. certainly didn’t have a game to sneeze at last night (150yds, 1TD), it appears that Crayton is back to his old tricks of snatching up TDs (two last night).

While Crayton was injured and dinged up, 10-21 through 11-22….T.O. went postal with 9 TDs.

The other six games, when Crayton was healthy? Just 5 TDs. Even though this translates to a more than healthy 14 TD season…..T.O. owners, like the man himself….WANT IT ALL.

(expeshally with the fantasy playoffs coming…..)

So…Mr. Crayton….bust a hammy in practice…..start hanging out in Palmetto Bay….whatever….if you know what’s best….you’ll just stay the f*#% out of the end zone.

…..and Leonard Weaver is your only fantasy back-up.

Paraphrasing the immortal Bob Knight….you lay back and enjoy the pounding….or you can do one of these other productive activities:

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kudos and thanks to rob at fantasyhumor.com

How many times have said to yourself, “I’d suck the gas right out of Jessica Alba’s Ass!”. Well…..now you’re going to get your chance…..because in a GasChannel/flatusyahu.com exclusive, Jessica Alba’s Ass provides you with fantasygas each and every week!

So sit back, get the tissues (and your fantasy roster) ready…..and feast on these juicy nuggets from Jessica Alba’s Ass:

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Good Shit.

Good shit. These guys are geniuses.