[original image via WENN]
first gayrod and madonner.
now barack and hillary.
we can’t wait for the sex tapes to emerge. verne troyer’s attorney, please pick up the white courtesy phone…
nah, we’re just kidding.
we don’t THINK bill richardson and other super delegates who have supported obama have anything to worry about. (but they might want to get their psa levels checked or their mams mammogramed.)
teddy is the last of the great kennedys and we wish him much peace, comfort and courage. in fact we encourage you to send him the “tax and spend bear” from the Vermont Teddy Bear Company.
and we’re even sorta kinda slightly but not over-the-top sorry that we posted this.
finally a sports story on flatusyahu!
and they say Americans are perverts.
According to the AP (which supplied some of the facts, but none of the opinions), to a sordid story already dripping with sex and allegations of Nazi role-play, we can now add a dash of espionage.
British newspapers have reported Sunday that a call girl involved in a five-girl sex romp with auto racing boss Max Mosley was married to an agent from Britain’s domestic intelligence service MI5.
(The MI5 is like the CIA, but only more stylish. And apparently more perverted.)
The Sunday Times says the agent left MI5 in April after admitting that his wife was one of five prostitutes who took part in the sex acts.
Quick poll…..what’s worse….finding out your wife is a prostitute or waking up one day to find out hillary clinton was elected your president?
Another great part of this story is that Mosley refuses to step down as the head of Formula One:
note: all personalities in this fictional pairing of sports and entertainment celebrity “couples” involve ONLY persons older than 18 years of age.
The whole Roger Clemens/Mindy McCready May-December thing has caused quite a stir (mostly because McCready was only 15 at the time).
We took a look through some of the emails from our tipsters and have come up with some Jailbait romances that would surely stoke the fires of the gossip pages:
Joe Paterno and Christina Ricci. Both Italian. Both rocking the black and white Goth look. Both going through career difficulties. A nice romantic trip to Venice would get this relationship headed in the right direction…..and on the front pages of every publication from flatusyahu to The New Republic.
Nadia Comaneci and Haley Joel Osment. Bart Connor isn’t half the man that Haley Joel Osment is! Actually…they’re both pretty much the same size. Fifty is the new Thirty and Nadia trades in one midget for another and winds up in the arms of HJO. Besides, nothing turns on a woman more than these four words: “I see dead people”.
